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Active Listening

When pushing equity work forward alongside BIPOC individuals, groups, and organizations, active listening is more important than ever. By this, we mean aiming to understand a group's needs and experiences rather than imposing solutions. Active listening is the practice of preparing to listen, observing what verbal and non-verbal messages are being sent, and then providing appropriate feedback for the sake of showing attentiveness to the message being presented.  This type of listening conveys mutual respect between speaker and listener and results in more impactful conversations.  

A quick internet search will surface dozens of tips and tricks for active listening.  The tool shared here is one example of steps you can take to ensure you are deeply listening and engaged in any conversation. 

Release: Prepare yourself to listen

  • Temporarily suspend your agenda
  • Be open minded; seek to understand other’s thoughts and feelings
  • Be genuinely interested in the other’s experience
  • Be patient, don’t interrupt

Amplify: Encourage others to fully explore their feelings and thoughts

  • Inquire - ask brief insightful open-ended questions

Reflect: Test, revise and validate understanding of other’s thoughts and feelings

  • Summarize and playback to check for understanding
  • Paraphrase and link perspectives

Attend: Pick up full range of other’s behaviors verbal and nonverbal

  • Orient your body toward the other person
  • Maintain appropriate eye contact
  • Be sensitive to inconsistency in verbal and nonverbals
  • Be non-judgemental and patient when listening

It is important to remember that equity work takes time, patience, and resilience. Actively and intentionally listening may take longer but the outcomes will be more equitable, collaborative, and lasting.

Reflect

Think of someone who always seems to “hear you”.

Think about a time when you may not have actively listened (rushing through a conversation, not being open to what others are saying, etc.)

In Practice

Prepare for the conversation

  • know what your objectives are but be flexible to “release your agenda” if needed
  • Be present; clear your mind of all other priorities. Identify tactics that can help you such as a moment of breathing or meditation prior to the conversation
  • Practice reflecting language “What I am hearing is…”, “Let me say that back to you to make sure I understand…” 
  • Leverage other tools such as the Iceberg Model or Ladder of Inference to probe and ask deeper questions 

Avoid these pitfalls

  • Aggressive, skeptical, or questioning tone
  • Checking your phone
  • Dismissing someone’s worries
  • Interrupting
  • Offering unsolicited advice
  • Saying “you should”
  • Crafting your responses while they’re talking
  • Turning the focus back on you

Going Further

Watch

For tips on conscious listening:

For tips on being present while listening:

Tool Collaboration

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Last Updated March 10th, 2022